My personal run-in with Godfrey Bloom, and why UKIP is so terrifying | Brigitte Phillips

Over the past couple of days I have noticed a lot of anti-UKIP material floating around the internet, which is of course all well and good, but I have noticed that (especially on tumblr), the perpetrators are not being named. This blog post is somewhat of a reply to a very good post I saw on tumblr, outlining some of their worst and most worrying policies, and mentioning some problematic behaviour that their party members have displayed. I found that this particular post mentioned a lot of problematic behaviour from one particular (and so far unnamed) UKIP MEP, from 'Bongo-Bongo Land' to calling women 'sluts'. I’m going to add to this conversation and say that the racist and misogynist UKIP MEP menioned above should be named and shamed; that man is Godfrey Bloom, and I have personal experience of his unique brand of odiousness.

When I was 16, my school was involved in BBC School’s Question Time, and as part of our entry to the competition, we had to organise our own Question Time, and being the politically involved teenager I was, I dragged my dad along. Sonali Shah of Newsround chaired the discussion, and amongst other local representatives from Labour, Conservatives, Lib Dem, and Green, Yorkshire and Humber MEP Godfrey Bloom starred on the panel. The turn-out was great, the school hall was absolutely packed out, people even had to stand up at the back, and as well as the school’s cameras, there were also people there filming from Look North.

I also feel the need to add that at this point in early 2010, UKIP didn’t pose nearly as much of a threat as they do now, and at that point they were mostly dismissed as close-minded euro-sceptics. As I’m sure you can tell, Godfrey Bloom was being his usual unpleasant self. However, he made one point about the justice system, which I couldn’t let lie. If I remember correctly, he said (word for word) that ‘criminals should be left to rot in prisons for the rest of their lives’. I, of course, raised my hand and directed a question/statement towards Mr Bloom, which went along the line of “I’m afraid I can’t agree with what you said there, surely rehabilitation is a highly important part of the course of justice?”.

I don’t know what I thought would happen next, but I didn’t think it would be this; he had the audacity to try to undermine me in front of several hundred people, and several television cameras. Again, word for word (I don’t think I’ll forget these words, actually) he said to me, in front of all of those people, “I don’t think you know what you’re talking about, dear.”

I was furious, and to this day I am thankful that I had the wherewithal to retort, “Oh, I do know what I’m talking about, you’re just wrong.” I then went on to make my point about how in order for people to become productive members of society, blah blah blah, they need psychiatric help. He had nothing more to say on the subject, but I seem to remember the Labour and Lib-Dem representatives backing up my point which was very pleasing. The best part was, once I had finished ripping Godfrey Bloom to pieces, my dad leaned over to me, put an arm round me and said, “I’m proud of you.” If I had managed to impress him, I knew that I had done well.

This is a massive part of the reason why I find UKIP so terrifying on a personal level (there are other things, but those can be said another time). I have first-hand experience of the contempt and lack of respect they hold for women, and if they come into power, it will be terrifying. He felt justified to be a condescending twat to a young, politically engaged woman in front of a massive audience of people. I dread to think what kind of affect it would have on someone who was less confident than I managed to be on that night. Not only was it disrespectful, but it was plain unprofessional. Even if you were somehow awful enough to agree with their policies, there is no way you would want someone so petty and childish to have any kind of power.

This, on top of the rampant racism and homophobia, is why UKIP is as very serious threat to anyone who isn’t a straight cis white male, and it is also why everyone needs to become more engaged with politics, and make sure they don’t take any more power than they already have. The world will become a much more dangerous place for oppressed people in the UK if they win the General Election.

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LSi’s Top Five Nineties Games

We’re all suckers for nostalgia and, as nineties kids, we can’t help but beam with joy as we reminisce about our childhoods spent playing Pokémon and various cute platform games on our Gameboy Colours and PlayStation One consoles. If only we could forget about our degrees and go back to the simpler days of hunting for Pokémon and collecting apples. Instead, LSi offer you some escapism with our top five nineties games.

Pokémon Yellow

What platform?

Pokémon Yellow was published by Nintendo for the Game Boy.

What’s the deal?

Released right at the height of the anime’s popularity, Pokémon Yellow gave us what Red and Blue had deprived us, a little Pikachu to follow you around everywhere. While you had to sacrifice the choice of starter Pokémon that the other games in the series offered you, you could emulate the hero of the TV series, Ash, and have a Pikachu of your own.

Why so iconic?

Combined with the popularity of the TV series, the card game, and all the other merchandise, this era of Pokémon has reached an almost legendary status in the collective consciousness of those who grew up in the 90s. Pokémon has a winning formula; gym badges and the Elite four for the competitive, and the ‘catch-them-all’ mentality for the completionists. With Pokémon X and Y, the most recent games in the series, being as popular as ever, it is easy to see why Pokémon Yellow has a rightful place in the list of most influential 90s games.


Mario Kart 64

What platform?

Mario Kart 64 could be played on the (you guessed it) Nintendo 64.

What’s the deal?

This was the game to play when you went round to a friend’s house for tea. As well as the newly introduced 3D graphics, this addition to the franchise also brought with it the functionality of having up to four players at once.

Why so iconic?

The Mario Kart games have a refreshingly simple premise; win the race. The friendly graphics and the ability to play as your favourite Mario character helps to secure the franchise’s long running popularity, and it must be working! Guinness World Records awarded Mario Kart the Best-Selling Racing Game record. While Mario Kart 64 wasn't the first game in the series, it can be argued that the Nintendo 64 was a far more popular and influential gaming system than the SNES was.


Crash Bandicoot

What platform?

Crash Bandicoot was exclusive to the PlayStation.

What’s the deal?

Crash Bandicoot follows the eponymous anthropomorphic marsupial through dozens of platform levels after being the subject of a scientific experiment gone wrong at the hands of the antagonist, Doctor Neo Cortex. Although everybody’s favourite bandicoot has a somewhat limited amount of moves, especially in the first game of the series, the varied worlds and all they contain are more than enough to keep even the most seasoned gamer happy.

Why so iconic?

Although it’s hard to believe almost 20 years down the line, at the time of its release, Crash Bandicoot had some of the best graphics in the entire gaming industry. It also spawned multiple sequels, and is even one of the few Western games to become a best-seller in Japan, an accolade which speaks for itself.


Tomb Raider

What platform?

The original 1996 of Tomb Raider was released on MS-DOS, PlayStation and Sega Saturn, but several months ago it was also released for iOS.

What’s the deal?

Tomb Raider follows the scantily clad archaeologist Lara Croft as she searches for ancient artefacts. On her way through these tombs, she must kill enemies, collect objects, and solve puzzles in order to retrieve the treasures.

Why so iconic?

While some of Lara’s fame may be attributed to some of the astounding polygons she had on her chest, I’m sure that the 2001 film starring gorgeous Angelina Jolie might have helped secure Lara’s place in the public consciousness. However, despite Ms Jolie's acting credentials, it is impossible to ignore the fact that the game most likely became so popular due to Lara Croft’s good looks, with people even going as far as to call her video gaming’s first sex symbol.


Spyro the Dragon

What platform?

Like Crash Bandicoot, Spyro the Dragon was also exclusive to Sony PlayStation.

What’s the deal?

The first game in the Spyro the Dragon series, it tell the story of the eponymous purple dragon and his dragonfly companion Sparx as they make their way through progressively more difficult ‘realms’ in order to progress to the next homeworld. The realms all utilise Spyro’s various specialist skills, such as gliding, charging, and breathing fire.

Why so iconic?

As well as the exclusivity to PlayStation, Spyro the Dragon has another similarity to Crash Bandicoot; graphics ahead of its time. As well as a trail of sequels, the little purple dragon has also managed to spawn multiple spin-offs, including appearances in the Skylander franchise. Both the game, and Spyro himself, particularly appealed to children. As the children of the late 90s are now in their 20s, it is easy to see how a game so popular with those children will now have taken a firm spot in the generational mentality.

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Online Dating – A Social Experiment

It was the Christmas Break of 2012, and I had just come out of a long term relationship. In order to combat the boredom of a month in the middle of nowhere after spending my first semester at uni, I decided to do what others have done before me, and make an OkCupid account. At that point in time, screenshots of terrible ‘nice guy’ profiles and creepy messages were making the rounds on the internet and quite frankly I wanted to get in on the action. I decided to turn this venture into my own little social experiment, creating a profile with some of the most ridiculous answers to the ‘about me’ questions possible.

Once I was suitable satisfied with the monster I had created, I sat back and let the magic happen. It was truly incredible how quickly the matches started rolling in. By no means were they all idiots, many lovely people participate in online dating and it is pleasant for everyone involved, however the vast majority of the first people I encountered were, to put it politely, completely flipping bonkers.

What’s worse is a sizable chunk of them didn’t seem to have even read my profile. Despite the fact that most of my profile was at best passive aggressive and at worst completely crazy, I would receive dozens of messages a day telling me that I ‘seemed nice’. I felt judged on a superficial level, and it made me feel incredibly uncomfortable. Wasn’t there more to online dating than the aesthetics of the candidates?

After days of wading through a sea of misogyny, I came across the best message that I think I ever received on that website; a masochist begging me to set him humiliating tasks.

It was like I had hit the jackpot. The sadist in me was definitely tempted to comply, even if it was just to get some good blogging material. However, he became more and more needy, sending me at least one message a day, asking if I wanted to set him any challenges. Through a combination of not wanting to lead him on, and not actually being able to come up with any fun challenges, I let him go.

However, he didn’t truly exemplify what I came to OkCupid for. He was just a guy, who was very open and forward about his kink and knew what he wanted. No, the man I had been waiting for was just around the corner. This profile lived in the magical realm of either fiction, or a genuine actual real life prat.

This guy listed what he required from his fellow OkCupid users: “What im looking for in a girl: you should be someone who isnt gunna cheat on me (come on you wont score a guy like me again lol). you cant be fat no offence but really im not into that at all. So yeah if you are looking for a nice guy to keep you warm on cold nights im your man”. He also told me that I would be a 9/10 if I lost some weight and he also appeared to be a racist; it was like the Holy Trinity of OkCupid. Funnily enough, when asked if his life was a movie, which genre would it be, he replied with horror. A date with him certainly would be my worst nightmare. He even had the audacity to refer to himself as a ‘nice guy’. You couldn’t make it up.

Unfortunately, after a couple of months, the hilarious messages started to drop off and instead I was getting messages from people who were genuinely interested in me, despite the  things I had written on my profile. Even now as I look through the hundreds of unread messages on my now dormant account, I feel a pang of guilt. Yet despite the fact that I have happily been in a relationship for the past few months, I still keep my account open, hoping upon hope that I will get messages as fantastic as I used to back in my halcyon days of OkCupid.

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How Smartphone Gaming Could Make The World A Better Place

     In the last couple of weeks, smartphone gaming has come to the forefront in spectacular fashion with the sudden and skyrocketing popularity of the frustrating retro-feel cluster headache that is Flappy Bird, as well as its catastrophic downfall. There were times at the height of the mania, when you could literally see people walking down the street with Super Mario-esque noises coming from their iPhones. Hell, the creator Dong Nguyen made the claim that Flappy Bird had ‘ruined [his] simple life’. While it has come under a huge amount of scrutiny and criticism, I still maintain an incredibly soft spot for the yellow avian demon, and smartphone gaming as a whole. Even though at times it can almost feel impossible to maintain a friendship with someone who plays Candy Crush obsessively (the notifications alone just make me want to delete all of Facebook), mobile gaming has a way of pervading modern society in a way that just hasn’t been afforded to gaming in the past.

     While the first incarnation of Pong was released by Atari over 40 years ago, until very recently gaming seemed to live very much in the domain of geekdom and was considered a waste of time by the vast majority of the mainstream. However, as smartphones have become more commonplace, and almost expected, in the last few years, gaming has begun to reach a larger audience than ever before. By presenting a pastime (which has the reputation of being somewhat ‘under the radar’) on a platform available to a much larger proportion of the populace, we are taking the whole culture of gaming out of the hands of the people who have illegitimately claimed it as their own.

     While it is true that for the last 30 or so years, gaming has remained a bastion of nerd culture, this may not be the healthiest place for it to reside. Nerd culture has some fantastic assets, such as the creation of communities where people who are normally outsiders can feel comfortable, and arguably nerd culture has helped the internet develop into what it is today. However, despite the seemingly accepting appearance, there is still a shockingly large misogynistic proportion of the nerd and gaming community which treats their valued media and the discussion surrounding it as an old boy’s club. In order to be ‘allowed’ to be a ‘true’ fan of any of these jealously guarded manifestations of creativity, you must first fulfil a highly specific list of criteria that has been created by the other ‘true fans’. It can surely be argued that anything which takes the ‘ownership’ away from these sorts of people can only be a good thing.

     Despite the fact that women account for 45% of the game playing population, and 31% of the game playing population are women over 18, gaming is still portrayed in the mainstream media as being dominated largely by men. Not only does the media perpetuate this stereotype, but gamers themselves do too. In an environment where an extremely popular source of entertainment is dominated by a tiny minority of young, often self-entitled, white males berating others not meeting their criteria as ‘fake’ gamers, the popularity in smartphone gaming almost seems to be giving them the proverbial finger. While the aforementioned gamers are engaged in flame wars as to which next gen console is the best, the silent majority slip by and actually have fun!

     But it’s not just women who will see the benefits from gaming becoming a more accepted part of the mainstream, it will open up opportunities for older generations to join in on the action. As I’m sure any of you with older relatives with Facebook accounts will know, social games such as the dreaded Candy Crush Saga are a positive hit with the Baby Boomers. It is understandable why puzzlers such as these with a simple premise and colourful, friendly-looking graphics would be popular with the inexperienced gamer. Smartphone games don’t seem anywhere near as daunting or intimidating as first-person shooters such as Call of Duty, and appear to be a safe and familiar path into the world of gaming. An added bonus is the relative cheapness of smartphone video games, rarely more than a few quid and often cost nothing; they seem relatively risk free when compared with the investment in a gaming console which may well not agree with you. Coupled with the added simplicity of using a platform you are already familiar with, not having to learn how to use any of those fiddly controllers, the accessibility of smartphone games to the older generation is spelling a success for the gaming world as a whole.

     For me, smartphone gaming is almost a gateway drug into the world of gaming. It is quick, affordable, and accessible for the uninitiated, and a pleasant and more superficial way to pass time for the hardcore gamer. It has opened up a whole universe to an unprecedented amount of people from all walks of life. While the platform is far from perfect, I’d argue that the addictive and slightly obnoxious nature of smartphone games will help to bring gaming to the masses even more, and will be a nail in the coffin of elitist gaming snobbery.

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The top five New Year stereotypes

We are now well into the second month of 2014 and, statistically, the vast majority of people will have already terribly failed their new year’s resolutions. However there are still some brave souls desperate to achieve their objective, battling through each and every day.

The Calorie Counter

You will often see these poor souls skulking around the food establishments in the Union, with haunted, pleading eyes. Determined to drop these last few pounds, and unwilling to accept the long-term downfalls of dieting, they actively shun all fun and pleasurable foods. On the rare occasion that you do see them eating, they are easy to distinguish from other people, mostly due to the light draining from their eyes while mournfully looking at their single toasted cornflake with low fat spread. An additional distinctive feature of the Calorie Counter is their repetitive and slightly panicked mantras. These are most often heard as the Calorie Counter is walking past a particularly delicious-smelling branch of Subway. Some notable weight loss mantras include ‘A moment on the lips, a lifetime on the hips’, ‘Keep tracking, stop slacking’ and numerous other gems. However, inevitably, there will come a day when they stop counting calories so rigorously and life will slowly return to them once again.

The Dry January

These brave souls may be torturing themselves in the name of charity, or they may have come to the realisation that their liver just can’t take another night at Halo; either way, these intrepid folk must be praised for their outstanding willpower. For the first 31 days of the New Year (or for however long they decide to do it), they will be the officially designated ‘sensible adult’ at all social engagements. The Dry Januarys are easy to spot, as they are the ones soberly sipping their fifth diet coke of the evening, looking very bored while their inebriated chums slowly descend into incoherence. As well as not being able to join in on the drunken fun, they may well be the ones tasked with getting their paralytic friends home without choking on their own vomit or getting stabbed. No matter which way you look at it, it certainly looks like they have a fun few months ahead of them.

The Penny Pincher

This person was hundreds of pounds into their overdraft within weeks of the first semester and they have decided to give themselves an intervention. The Bank of Mum and Dad has officially been closed, so until the next lot of student loan comes in, discount chicken ramen noodles are their new best friend. While their peers are having takeaways and paying £5 entry to clubs, they are forcibly smiling at their meagre dinners and are opting for a night in front of 4od. It can somewhat be a nuisance to live under the same roof as a Penny Pincher, as the heating is almost never on and every invitation to do something other than miserably watching Jeremy Kyle is met with a sullen ‘I can’t afford it’. However, this will all soon be over once third semester comes around, when their last lot of loan is safely in the bank. They will frivolously spend, forgetting all that they learned in those tough months, only to leave themselves desperately out of pocket. And so the cycle continues.

The Gym Bunny

Whether they’re aiming to climb the Parkinson Steps without breaking out a sweat, or wanting to further chisel their Adonis-like form, people all over campus are renewing their Edge membership in an attempt to battle the post-Yuletide lethargy. It is normally very difficult to be friends with a gym bunny at this time of year, as every single question about their day or invitation is answered with crazed mutterings about cardio and lifting weights. There is something about the Gym Bunny that almost seems mechanical. The relentless pursuit of a sweet bod calls to mind Arnie’s persistent hunt for Sarah Connor. While the Calorie Counter can almost become atrophied in their quest for health, the struggle seems to make the Gym Bunny more powerful, until they practically become an unstoppable juggernaut. The Gym Bunny may keep up this routine for months on end, but will gradually become more and more human as time goes on, once they learn the correct balance between the treadmill and being a functioning human being.

The Baby Vegetarian

The Baby Vegetarian’s New Year’s resolution is to never eat meat ever again. They will often be found in Waterstones, piles of vegetarian cookbooks in hand as they realise that all cooking experience they’ve ever had has been centred around the preparation of animal flesh. The realisation may also have suddenly dawned on them that all the places that were once their favourite eating establishments now have two, slightly anaemic, dishes to offer them. Another notable feature of the Baby Vegetarian is the inability to not talk about the fact that they have just become vegetarian. Seemingly oblivious about whether their friends care about it or not, they will regale them with stories about how they’re feeling so much healthier now in enviable, moralistic vitriol. Despite their newfound holier-than-thou attitude, you may find Baby Vegetarians eating foods that the Veteran Vegetarians wouldn’t touch with a barge pole, such as Nutella and Tangfastics.

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Why you shouldn't make New Year's Resolutions

It has come to that time of year where it is impossible to watch TV without seeing about 40 different adverts for diet plans and celebrity weight loss videos, and it isn’t just the post-Christmas pudge that can be blamed for this. People all across the planet are desperately clutching at unattainable targets to making themselves into better human beings, and you may be falling under the same spell. But no fear, I’m here and I’m going to tell you why you shouldn’t make New Year’s Resolutions this year.

1. The numbers are against you

In 2012, the University of Scranton found that only 8% of people ever achieve their resolutions each year, and a quarter of Americans always fail to meet their targets. With statistics like these, the concept of New Year’s Resolutions can definitely be thrown into scrutiny. Yet, despite the figures, year after year millions of people still insist on losing weight or being more organised.

2. It’s expensive

You may be promising to involve yourself in a new hobby, or insisting that you make use of your gym membership, but one thing you can be sure about is that New Year’s Resolutions are a money vacuum. Once you’ve covered sign up fees, membership costs, paid for materials and transport, you will have spent an eye watering amount of money. Especially if you are a student, this is exactly the kind of situation you want to avoid;  surely all that dosh would be better spent on nights out and fast food?

3. You’re probably setting yourself up for disappointment

New Year’s Resolutions have an incredibly high failure rates, yet we still insist on giving ourselves seemingly impossible tasks. People have a tendency to set themselves completely unrealistic targets for their resolutions, with a kind of unsustainable all-or-nothing attitude. Whether it is endless lists of minor self improvements, or one huge vague target like ‘EAT LESS’ or ‘WORK HARDER’, you’re going to end up not achieving your goals, and end up feeling like a failure. Save yourself the bother by not setting yourself such unattainable goals.

4. You’re probably fine as you are

Unfortunately, the vast majority of New Year’s Resolutions seems to be targeted at people who are insecure about their appearance, and companies are more than willing to capitalise on that. As I mentioned earlier, you can barely traverse through mainstream media without being bombarded by messages telling you to lose weight especially at this time of the year. However, I am by no means invalidating people’s wants to better themselves, physical or otherwise. Want to eat healthier? Go for it. Need to make more friends? Fire away. Your grades desperately need improvement? Hop to it. However, this does beg the question, why wait for an arbitrary day on the calendar to do this?

5. Why wait for New Year?

I argue that you can take the steps towards being a better person on any day of the year. It can be easy to compartmentalise, and subscribe to the ‘New Year, New Me’ school of thought, but don’t you think that’s limiting? If you want to improve yourself, why wait until it’s a convenient day to do it, and start improving yourself NOW. By waiting until the start of the New Year, you are already confirming to yourself that you are procrastinating, and it increases the likelihood of failure. Self-improvement is a constant, ongoing process, and it doesn’t have to wait until the 1st January to happen.

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Gender Surprise: The Kinder Conundrum

Ahh yes, Kinder Surprise, many a childhood memory can be recalled; the mixed excitement and disappointment of cracking open the little brown eggs of joy to discover what my ‘surprise’ was this time.  These chocolatey treats have become iconic over their decades of existence, but the seemingly calm Kinder waters have been disturbed.

By no means are Ferrero, the manufacturers of the aptly named confection, free from past conflicts. Kinder Surprise have achieved legendary status in the US, where they have become prohibited from sale or import due to a bizarre FDA regulation which bans, ‘the sale of any candy that has embedded in it a toy or trinket.’ However, a new controversy is in town, and it’s coloured pink and blue.

Earlier this year, the Kinder Surprise was launched with different coloured wrappers to hint at the surprises inside; blue for cars, pink for dolls. While no explicit reference to gender has been made, the intent is obvious, Ferrero are asking parents to pick the ‘right’ egg for their child in a seemingly desperate attempt to reclaim dwindling sales. There has been an understandable outcry across the internet, with numerous change.org campaigns (one of which can be found here) being launched to combat it. While many people will be nodding their heads in agreement at the outrage, there will be without doubt several people who have found their way to this page and asked, ‘what is the problem?’

After all, surely this will save tears? Thousands of little boys receiving fairy princesses, and girls with accidental dumper trucks will no longer have this concern! Maybe now parents can make sure that their children get the toys they want in the first place? While this may be a concern for some presents, we need to start asking why these children want these toys in the first place; maybe the Kinder conundrum is a symptom of the illness, and not the cause. In our increasingly (albeit slowly) more accepting and open-minded world, is this kind of gender stereotyping a step backwards? In a word: yes.

To the initiated, the assignment of play-things based on the genitals you own seems preposterous, but to those unfamiliar with gender struggles it seems to be the norm. The Kinder conundrum on its own has the potential to be innocuous, but unfortunately contributes to a toxic mindset which enforces the patriarchy. The arbitrariness of gendered toys often feels like something that we should have moved past by now, and should not be enforcing further.

However, I don’t believe that the blame should rest solely with Ferrero; this reaction to falling sales seems to me to be a symptom of our patriarchal culture. In a society which still places such emphasis on gender roles, it’s hardly surprising that companies would exploit archaic views of masculinity and femininity for their gain. Millions of people have had these kinds of backward values so ingrained in them, that they defend them without question; maybe this is the real problem that should be solved?

I suggest that instead of campaigning against the perpetrating corporations, we should instead try to educate ourselves and each other about the implications of such gender stereotyping. This is by no means a simple task, and it will probably take generations for this kind of petty discrimination to be stamped out, but it will be worth the effort. We must remember that there are whole lot of people out there who see no issue in gender stereotyping, but this will be through ignorance rather than wilful bigotry. Patience is the key! Once people’s attitudes begin to change, the rest will begin to look after itself. It is very sad that Ferrero have taken this sort of action, but maybe we should stop sharpening our pitchforks at them, and instead consider tackling the issue at its root.

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